I knew this day would come but all the preparation in the world doesn't make it any easier. Today is the day that I will have to put my 19 year old cat Shadrach to sleep.
I have watched him grow from a wild kitten into a 20 pound tom cat and I have watched him deteriorate from that bad ass physique into a frail 6 pound old man. In human years he is close to 100. He is in kidney failure, last night he lost the ability to move his hind legs, it's time to say goodbye.
The earliest appointment I could get was for this afternoon, it feels like forever and it feels cruel to prolong his suffering. I'm trying really hard to put on the brave face but I know that soon I will fall to pieces.
My heart is breaking knowing that in just a few hours he wil be gone from my life forever. I know that some will say, "Get over it, he was only a cat!" but he was my cat and has seen me through all of my adult life. So if that is what you are thinking right now, don't say it out loud.
Shadrach was named after a Beastie Boys song from the album "Paul's Boutique." Cool song, cool name, cool cat.
You were so loved and will be greatly missed Shat cat.